MAINTAINING JOY IN UNEMPLOYMENT

I was unhappy, bored and wasting time so I drank a lot.  Too much, and I figured out that I didn’t want to waste the things I have learned and the time I had left by medicating so quit drinking.  I had issues so sought a Christian therapist who got me through them and I was on my way to turning my life around.  She talked me into gong to treatment and eventually AA and that is where some real learning began. 

What surprised me most was that most of the discussions around AA dealt with serenity and the things that happen that destroy it.  Some we bring upon ourselves, some not, but they are there and steal our inner peace.

I was actually surprised that treatment predominantly dealt with theses issues rather than what I assumed would happen; some kind of classes about alcohol, drugs etc.  They were there, but not as large as the theme of having joy in our lives.

The 12 steps include one about incorporating all these principles into all of the aspects of our lives.  I am a big believer in that; I wrote a memoir for my family dealing with how to do just that.  I have concluded that serenity is the biggest thing we all want, and it includes faith, healthy relationships and a purpose.

Now we have huge numbers of unemployed people in the country, and most of them are not happy.  How could they be?  We all need money to survive, we need the self esteem of making a living as independently as we can, and we need to have something productive to do; a purpose.  They are not alcoholics, but have a similar problem: serenity.  So, how do your find joy in this situation?

It’s easy for me to say.  I have stuff to do and make enough money to provide for me and my wife.  But, I have a few suggestions that an unemployed person may consider to maintain as much joy in their lives as they can under the circumstances.  Joy and a positive attitude may also help in a job search.

Other’s centered living:   Focusing only on one’s self can lead to pity parties, frustration, self worth deterioration, depression and other maladies.  Try this:

• Help someone else find a job
• Volunteer somewhere where the people are more unfortunate than you; you may realize you don’t have it so bad and will feel good helping someone
• Help someone better off than you, sounds crazy but you may have something they need
• Encourage everyone around you

Relationships:  AA steps show how to make amends and forgive others who have harmed you.  Carrying guilt and anger hurts you more than the other person.  Try this:

• Forgive the folks who fired you.  Really.  Start praying for them, many say that the hate will go away in weeks.  It will improve your attitude and interviews
• Take this time to make amends to people you have wronged.  Seek them out and ask for forgiveness
• Take this time to forgive others too, it is just baggage for you
• Most of God’s laws deal with relationships, take some time with Him and clear your plate there too

Ask for help:  This is one of the first tenants of AA, admitting we cannot do this on our own.  It takes a long time for some alcoholics to get to this point.  For those who have been successful in their jobs, but lost them, it can be almost as hard to ask for help.  Many are willing to help, so try it.  And see if you can help them too.

The AA folks guard their serenity as though their lives depend upon it; in many cases it does.  They have learned the importance of this, I think we all should.

I am not naive enough to believe that this will solve anyone’s problems, but it is a start.  I hope that some people who know more than I will comment on this page for other’s benefits.  Thank you